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From Silence to Strength: How Women Can Command Respect in the Workplace

From Silence to Strength: How Women Can Command Respect in the Workplace

A client of mine, an extremely talented and intelligent young woman, recently got involved in an exciting and innovative project—one that is not only with futuristic technologies but also offers her a chance to deepen her professional skills and step into team management and leadership. Everything seemed promising until, six months in, she confided in me that she was considering leaving the company. What could prompt a talented and ambitious individual to contemplate such a drastic shift in her career?

If you’re a woman, the answer might be familiar: the relentless reinforcement of male dominance.

In business, women often find themselves balancing the need to bring their unique leadership qualities to the table while also navigating environments that have been historically shaped by and for men. My wish for all the amazing women in business is to understand that they are not the problem. While societal norms may push us to be nice and accommodating, thriving in a male-dominated field also demands a radical protection of our boundaries.

Don’t miss out on opportunities. Don’t silence yourself out of fear of being labeled difficult or aggressive. I encourage you to take a powerful stance and embrace this truth: women are exceptional leaders, the kind of leaders our future desperately needs.

In this post, I’d like to explore how we, as women in business, sometimes communicate in ways that make it easy for others to disregard our voices or intimidate us—and, more importantly, how we can change that.

How we sabotage the weight of our communication:

Minimizers:

Using words like “just,” “a little bit,” or “kind of.”

State your points directly and confidently without minimizing your statements.

Softeners:

Phrases like “I think,” “maybe,” or “I feel.”

Replace with stronger statements, such as “I believe,” “It is,” or simply stating the fact.

Hedging:

Phrases that suggest uncertainty, like “I’m not sure but,” or “This might sound silly but.”

Remove these phrases and state opinions and facts directly.

Apologizing:

Saying “sorry” too often, especially when it’s unnecessary.

Save apologies for when they are genuinely needed. Replace with “thank you for your patience” if necessary.

Asking for Permission:

Phrases like “Is it okay if,” or “Do you mind if.”

Make declarative statements instead, like “I will,” or “I need.”

Tag Questions:

Ending statements with questions like “don’t you think?” or “isn’t it?”

Make statements without seeking validation.

Uptalk:

Raising the pitch at the end of sentences, making them sound like questions.

Practice ending sentences with a downward inflection to sound more decisive.

To sound more assertive, we should:

Use strong, decisive language.

Maintain good posture and eye contact.

Speak clearly and at a moderate pace.

Practice saying “no” firmly when necessary.

Prepare and practice responses to common rude or dismissive remarks.

For example, if someone interrupts you, you can say, “Please let me finish,” or “I wasn’t done speaking.” If someone makes an inappropriate comment, you can address it directly by saying, “That comment is not appropriate.”

Here are some example phrases for various tough situations:

To protect yourself and assert your position:

“I don’t appreciate being interrupted. Please let me finish.”

“I have a different perspective that I’d like to share.”

“Let me clarify my point.”

To address inappropriate comments:

“That comment is not appropriate and does not contribute to our discussion.”

“I find that remark offensive. Let’s keep our conversation professional.”

“I don’t think that’s an acceptable thing to say in a work environment.”

To reclaim your ideas or opinions:

“As I was saying earlier, my suggestion is…”

“I’d like to revisit my point about…”

“I believe I mentioned that idea earlier. Let’s build on it.”

To firmly reject requests or demands:

“No, that’s not something I can accommodate.”

“I’m unable to take that on right now.”

“I understand your request, but my answer is no.”

 

To handle condescending behavior:

“I understand your point, but I have a different perspective.”

“I don’t appreciate being spoken to in that manner.”

“Please don’t talk down to me. We’re all professionals here.”

To call out mansplaining or patronizing explanations:

“I’m familiar with the subject, thank you.”

“I understand this topic well, let’s move on.”

“I’ve got this, but I appreciate your concern.”

These phrases can help you communicate your boundaries clearly and assertively. Practice them, role-play and even do voice and video records to build up your confidence and find your assertive voice.

Feel free to get in touch with me for a more in-depth conversation or if you’re looking to master assertive voice and elevate your leadership communication skills.

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